Rating: NC-17
Archive: Sure, but let me know.
Summary: Donna takes a late-night break to watch The Love Boat in CJ's office -- muses on why her life can't be exciting and romantic like that -- -- enter sea man Josh.
(You know, I've decided that one really can't make enough sea man/semen jokes...)
Spoilers: Takes place a couple of months after The War at Home
Disclaimers: Aaron Sorkin still owns them all.
Date: 7/11/01
Notes: Written for the July Challenge.
The Love Boat theme song is by P. Williams and C. Fox and was performed by Jack Jones (1977 - 1985).
I'm supposed to be working on a thing. Which is fine. Great, in fact. I love working. I am all about working. Except here it is, one in the morning, and I can find neither the stuff for the thing nor my assistant -- who, incidentally, knows where the stuff for the thing is.
I don't think she went home -- her twenty-five pound purse is still out by her desk. I can see a glow coming from CJ's office, so I start making my way down there, hoping to run into Donna on the way. Maybe she's making me tea or something down by the little coffee/beverage station across from CJ's door.
***
Love, exciting and new
Come aboard -- we're expecting you
Love, life's sweetest reward
Let it flow, it floats back to you
***
Okay. That's weird. I continue to follow the music that's strangely emanating from CJ's office.
Well, I'm pleased to announce that I've found Donna. She's sprawled out on the couch, with all the lights out, watching what appears to be the Love Boat.
Hell, I had no idea that was still on TV.
***
The Love Boat soon will be making another run
The Love Boat promises something for everyone
***
Now she's singing along with the theme song. Hmmm. I kind of like it when she sings because her voice is pretty. Sometimes when she sits out at her desk late at night, she wears headphones and sings along with whatever she's listening too -- and I sit in my office and listen to her voice.
She does a really beautiful Nothing Compares 2 U.
For some reason, though, whenever she gets to the line about 'putting her arms around every boy she sees' I feel my chest get a little tight and I want to rush out of my office and tell her all the things I know I'm not supposed to tell my assistant.
Okay, I think that makes me sound like some kind of lovesick lap dog with a bald, Irish girl fetish.
Which I'm not. I have no bald, Irish girl fetish.
"Donna," I call from the door.
"Josh?" She turns to look at me and I almost gasp at how tired she looks. Has she been like this all day? Crap, I should have sent her home earlier.
She starts to get up and I motion for her to stay where she is, choosing instead to join her.
"What'cha doin?" I ask, after I lift her legs up and put them back down in my lap once I'm seated at the end of the couch.
"Just taking a break. Do you need me to..."
"Nah, I need a break too. Can I sit with you?"
"Sure," she says softly, giving me a look like my head is on backwards or something.
***
Set a course for adventure,
Your mind on a new romance
Love won't hurt anymore
It's an open smile on a friendly shore
***
"I've always wanted to take a cruise," she says dreamily, staring at the TV.
"You should," I agree, easing one of her shoes off, followed by it's mate. I drop them to the floor while Issac the bartender gives his signature pointy gesture on the screen.
Right back at you, buddy.
"Yeah, but I'm sure I wouldn't meet anyone good," she sighs, stretching her legs out as I start to massage the foot closest to me.
"You might," I reply.
"Not quite so hard," she murmurs.
"Sorry. I forgot," I lessen pressure and she gives a little happy grunt of approval.
"You could come with me," Donna says suddenly, then looks a little flustered. "I mean, um, maybe as a working cruise."
"I'm not sure there'd be a reason to do official work on a cruise but I'll check with Leo in staff tomorrow."
"Really?" She asks, perking up a bit.
"Sure," I answer back, as I use my thumb to push into the ball of her foot. I feel a little bad about teasing her like this, but I am giving her a foot massage.
"You're not really going to ask him, are you?" She asks, with a disappointed huff.
"Nope," I smile, continuing to knead the hose-covered foot in my lap, trying to ignore the fact that her heel is a mere centimeter from my dick. Could move her foot -- sure -- but I'm a living on the edge kind of guy.
She gives me a little scowl before saying, "I'd probably get seasick anyway."
"I get seasick," I offer, switching feet.
"Why doesn't that surprise me?" She asks with a snort.
"You know, for someone's who getting a free foot massage here, you'd think you'd be a bit more gracious."
"With my luck, if I went on a cruise it'd turn into the Titanic," she muses, ignoring my complaint.
"Yeah, but before you went down, you'd find the love of your life," I say, realizing the innuendo a few seconds too late.
"But Josh, I always wait until I'm in love before I go down," she blurts out as I stop the motion of my thumb on her arch and just stare at her.
"Um, I'm ah, really tired," she laughs nervously, her cheeks getting all pink.
I carefully shift her legs towards my knees a few inches because suddenly, I'm getting some visuals that would make it not so much, 'living on the edge' but more like going over the edge of the cliff and taking my big boner and her foot, with me.
Yeah. Actually, let me clarify that -- very big. In fact, I think I'm going to be in need of some camouflage soon. Either that or find a way to start a conversation about flesh-eating bacteria.
"You know," I add, trying to change the subject. "I would so watch the Love Boat if they made it hit an iceberg."
"Yeah, but Charo would have to be a guest star."
"You don't like Charo?" I ask, resuming my movements on her foot.
"Well, she's kinda weird. What was that thing? Oh yeah," she sits up a bit and starts to shimmy her shoulders and yells out, "cootchie - cootchie - cootchie," as her breasts shake back and forth.
See, some days Donna wears bras that are kind of padded. I mean, I can just tell because on those days she looks more 'sculpted'. Other days, her chest looks more natural, sure, it's a little smaller, but it's all her.
I really like those days.
Today is one of those days so when she shook her upper body side to side like that...well...there was a lot of cootchie-cootchie going on.
I probably should have been watching her face when she did that.
***
Yes love! It's love!
The Love Boat soon will be making another run
The Love Boat promises something for everyone
***
"I just think it would be exciting."
"What?" I ask, grabbing a throw pillow from the couch and putting it in my lap so I can pull her feet back over, without her feeling how excited I'm getting right now.
"Setting a course for adventure. You know, my mind on a new romance."
"And you could only do this on a cruise?" Not say, in the office.
God I hope I didn't say that out loud.
"Well, it doesn't seem to be working on land," she answers back lazily.
Okay. Good, that other part was only in my head.
We're both silent for a few minutes. I really have nothing to lose. I mean, we're sitting here and we're talking and I might as well just ask what I've been wondering about for the last couple of months.
"Why did you want me to ask Joey out?" I question, turning to look her in the face.
"W-what?"
"You heard me."
"I told you...you wouldn't have to get..."
"My towels re-monogrammed. Yeah, but see, that's bullshit because I don't have monogrammed towels. You know I don't have monogrammed towels. Why did you want me to ask her out?"
"Because I know you like her," she says in a totally unconvincing voice. Well, at least it's unconvincing to me.
"How do you know that?"
"Because I do. Because I know you."
"I'm really not so sure you do," I mutter.
"You used to like her," she states.
"Yes."
"Last year, she was out here and you gave her a coffee mug and you were acting all weird."
"Yes," I agree again.
"So..." she says leadingly.
"So what?"
"So you liked her." She sighs impatiently at what I'm sure she perceives as my thick headedness.
"Yes, I did. Accent on the past tense."
"Okay. Well. Now I know that," she says in a tight voice.
"Yeah. Now you know that."
"Fine."
"Fine," I mimic back.
"But she's still your type," she claims, a few seconds later.
"What's my type, Donna?"
"You know, pretty, successful, professional women who have important jobs," she states, looking down at her fingernails.
"That's my type?"
"Yeah."
"No it's not," I reply defensively.
It's really not. I mean a lot of my ex-girlfriends, or even women I may have liked at one time, might have fit into that category, but it's not my type. I never really considered myself even having a type. I just like the women that I like. And I really like Donna.
"It's not?"
"No," I confirm, resting my arm down on her leg -- just to make sure she's not going to try to run away if this discussion continues to go where I think it's going to go.
"Since when is that not your type?" She demands.
"A while."
"Okay. So enlighten me. What's your type?"
You know what? Fuck it. I'm in a set a course for adventure, my mind on a new romance kinda mood.
I take a deep breath.
"Well, I've always appreciated a woman who can do a good Charo impersonation."
She just stares at me. Then asks, "what are you saying?"
"Well, that I've always appreciated..."
She cuts me off. "No, Josh. You're insinuating something and I want to make sure you realize what it is you're insinuating."
"What? Am I an idiot? I know what I'm insinuating, Donna."
"Do you really? Because I'm giving you an out."
"Don't want it," I proclaim, with a self-satisfied grin.
"So. In your own demented and completely inappropriate way, you're trying to tell me that I'm your type."
"Yes."
"Okay."
I stare at her.
"Okay? Just okay?"
She nods.
"Because when I say you're my type, I'm actually saying that..." I start but she cuts me off.
"Yes, I know what you're saying."
"You do?"
"Yes," she confirms.
"Okay, so enlighten me. What am I saying?"
"That you like me," she answers.
"Um, right. But more importantly," I start, pushing her feet off me so I can move up closer to her. "Is the fact that you like me."
I'm carefully trying to hold the pillow in place because there's no reason to actually show her how much I do like her -- at least not quite yet.
Maybe in about thirty seconds.
"I like you?" She asks innocently.
She'd almost have me if she wasn't grinning like a damn Cheshire cat.
"Yes. You do. Joey and that whole 'she wants you to ask her out' crap was misdirection. Because, *you*," I say, putting my index finger in the spot between her breasts for emphasis, as I move up the rest of the way so that our faces are about an inch apart, "like me."
"Yes," she confirms, inching a bit closer. "I do, Joshua."
"Good," I have time to whisper before I lean in the rest of the way to kiss her.
She pulls back quickly to add, "but you like me more," before sliding her tongue past my lips and running her hand up my thigh, until she reaches the pillow.
She tosses it to the floor without breaking the kiss.
***
End Part I | Go to Part II
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